KandyGem #17: Post Festival Blues


I’m awaken at the butt crack of afternoon, by my baby. Haaaa, really me with a baby… My momma, my niece and my nephew are all waiting for the day that I produce a child… I’m pretty sure my baby sister will have a baby before me. These last 3 years of my life I feel like I have gone backwards not forward. I got a fuck boy list longer than my grocery list, my schedule consist of party, sleep and sometimes work. And I blow money faster than a crack whore with enough to cop a bag.

life in shambles

So this baby I speak of actually is an old ass pit-bull, standing skinny but strong at 14 years old, nevertheless, he will always be my baby*in the voice of Mariah Carey when her ass could sang.

old-man-remy.jpgMy pit thinks it’s cute to wake me up every day between 11am and 1pm. I work night shift, so waking up at 1pm is early for me. Unfortunately, his arthritic bones don’t allow for him to move when I get home in the early mornings after my shift. So this ninja waits until his bones are warm and nimble then wakes me up, like clock work everyday in the early afternoon.

When I rise and die, the first thing I sometimes/always do, is scroll down my IG feed. That’s a must, you know these days we all have a social media problem, I gotta see who loves me in this world… usually nobody. My regular page averages 9 likes unless I’m wearing a bikini 😑. FeFeline in comparison be killing the game (in my mind) and that shit only gets 45 likes on average. I always wonder how bitches be pulling mad likes. But then again I really just don’t give a fuck I just do me. Anywho… Bitches don’t think I’m popping and that’s cool but I wake the fuck up and check my shit anyway and cheese like shit at 9 likes 😄.

Checking the gram I see in my feed a Red Bull TV app ad… “Watch EDC Las Vegas, because what happens in Vegas doesn’t always have to stay in Vegas.” Needless to say, I had to click on that MF. Well I did it for 2 reasons, I wanted to reminisce, but shit, my vain ass also wanted to see if I was captured on MF TV. Remember, it was at KineticField’s stage when I went to see Slander, and I shimmied my lil ass to the front. Slander was lit AF if I must say so myself and I was in EDM heaven. It was there, that the camera literally got all up in my face and my dramatic ass kinda did a “bite my lip kiss the air” type thing. Bitches I was really tryna make the cut and get on the fucking live stream. Shit I would put my ass on TV so why the fuck not. I downloaded the app, but they only have clips of some performances. I did not see Slander’s performance. But if you’re interested they did have an interview with him…

Since they did not have me on the screen, I decided to listen to explore a little bit. I stopped on one of the performances that I missed of a DJ that I’ve grown to love. “Frontlines” by Zed’s Dead & NGHTMRE. NGHTMRE is up there at the top for me, therefore I hit hit the link. The music started playing and I noticed I started to get a tingle all throughout my body. Now mtusic has given me this feeling before, but got damn usually I feel it in my cheeks and face. No, this was all throughout. I think it was the memories of being there, in Vegas and knowing how it feels live, that my body just teleported my ass right back to the desert. It was unreal. The tingles prompted me to jump right onto the laptop and write this entry.

Like I said NGHTMRE has become one of my favorite DJs. I’ve been chasing his ever since I saw his show in DC. Now that I’m getting into the festivals we, meaning me and Mya, are planning our future festivals. Festival decision making now is based on the line up. My list of DJs are becoming preferences opposed to suggestions, here are my favs and their IG pages (not listed in any particular order, except number ONE):

¤  SayMyName                     ¤  Slander
¤  NGHTMRE                        ¤  Kaskade
¤  JoyRyde                             ¤  DJ Snake
¤  Excision

The DJs and the lineup determines which festival days are absolute musts and which days we could miss. For example. Mya’s crew, which technically has become my crew, hit her up about going to Lollapalooza in Chicago. Ohhhh Chicago. Fond fucking memories even though I haven’t even talked to that man since the trip… I guess he been busy and this bitch has definitely been kinda busy… looking at pics of baby goats and shit lol. Ok I’m throwing in jokes that you gotta see the video first to understand. ⏸


#tbt #lol #accurate #nailedit #gm #instagood #isthisyou

A post shared by Black Dynamite (@olesoul57) on

▶️ Now that little girl gets my fucking life to a T. Where was I at?? Selecting festival days for Lollapalooza in Chicago. That shit looks fucking lit dawg. Me and Mya are tryna… hol’ up, hol’ up… before I continue, only because I’m pretty sure I’m undiagnosed ADD  and I had this thought as I wrote “Me and Mya” opposed to writing “Mya and I.” Remember in KandyGem #11, when  I was explaining to y’all that I am writing in slang on purpose?? Well I’m about to learn y’all today. There’s a word for that, Solecisms. Sorry, y’all, I know I be going off on tangents, but I gotta get these thoughts out of my head and on paper before I forget.

Definition Alert: Solecisms – In traditional grammar, a solecism is a phrase that transgresses the rules of grammar. The word originally was used by the Greeks for what they perceived as grammatical mistakes in their language. Ancient Athenians considered the dialect of the inhabitants of their colony, Soli, in Cilicia, to be a corrupted form of their own pure Attic dialect, and labelled the errors in the form as “solecisms.”
Hmmmm that shit sounds very familiar like, when ignorant ass white folk were tryna to teach Ebonics as a fucking language in California. Y’all know that was a bitch move… Why not do a better at your job and teach them MF how to speak and write proper English. How the fuck were you gonna teach Ebonics anyway? These kids be making up new fucking words every day and drop other shit like it never even happened. For example: “Are you da bomb?” “No bitch I’m Gucci AF and my face is beat with eyebrows on fleek” Where you been at??? Oh you learned that 90’s Ebonics ehhh.

Let me do this one mo’ ‘gain! Me, Mya, Lollapalooza in Chicago and the lineup. Got it… Me and Mya were asked if we wanted to join a last minute festival trip to Chicago. Some of the crew made an impromptu decision to attend Lollapalooza. They decided this shit literally 5 days before me drafting this post. By Mya being a travel nurse, she needs a switch or she takes a $400 penalty if she calls out; me, Imma be on some grimy ass shit and just take my days off cause I have no financial penalty. Many of my unicorns have fallen off so I’m good…

Side Note: If you don’t know what a unicorn 🦄 is, yo bitch ass ain’t been reading. I don’t explain shit twice unless by mistake. That’s a fucking pet peeve of mine, so take yo ass back a few entries and catch the fuck up cause I don’t have time for that shit. I gotta spend my time searching videos of baby goats my ninja 😭.

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We are desperately tryna get this switch for Mya cause the line up is gonna be hype. We are down for arriving on Friday but we need to go to the festival on Saturday and Sunday. Just look for yourselves. Purple is who I wanna see, Yellow is Mya’s choice and Red we both wanna be up in that bitch. Plus, that shit doesn’t even include the after party line up. We found that if we arrive on Friday, sure we may miss 2 festival days, but we have the option of going to and afterparty instead. Each fucking night from 10pm-2am, at up to 22 different venues, they will be hosting one of your favorite DJs for an after party. WTF!!!! Let’s just say once we saw the afterparty option we were drooling and foaming at the mouth. All the brainstorming power went into affect. I had even pre-scheduled my Boards
Exam for that Friday. Now I plan to move it forward to that Thursday or the last week of July. Needless to say I been studying extra hard incase I have to take it a week early #Priorities. But naw really look at those flyers…

The struggle is real as we are trying to figure this shit out. It’s not enough that Moonrise will be the following week. In our mind there is no such thing as too much. We will reach our limit once our resource have reached the limit.

kermit bluesThis mindset has brought me full circle to the reason of this blog entry. Post Festival Blues (PFB). Those who have experienced a festival of this nature know just what the fuck I’m talking about. I’ve gone to Afro Punk in New York and Broccoli fest in DC and both i thoroughly enjoyed and both I felt sad after, but not on the level of EDC.

Definition Alert: Post Festival Blue (PFB) – The comedown, as bad as heroin withdrawal, after returning home from a music festival. thanks urban dictionary for the realest of definitions lol
here are some good articles I found.
Seven Stages of Post Festival Blues &
Six Ways to Combat your Post Festival Blues

EDM takes over my entire being when I’m in the mix, so when I leave I feel so fucking lost. It’s a terrible side effect, that I’m sure festival coordinators love. It’s like my first job at Auntie Anne’s Pretzel in the Mall. MFs would eat one got damn pretzel and they would keep coming back for more. We had this buy 3 get 1 free deal, and it was all people would order. Like there was fucking crack in the dough or something. I would be at the register glaring at that long ass line, that always soared a mile past the adjacent Cinnabon, and be like “WTF bitches it’s just a pretzel.” Well EDM festivals, you are my Auntie Anne’s Pretzel, you are my crack, you are my Kryptonite. For the last 3 months 90% of my entertainment dollars have gone to EDM parties because I just can’t get enough.next fest blues

Now Mya, her ass is worse than me and the inspiration to the post, she is the epitome of PFB. Her ass gets a form of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). When we boarded the Southwest flight back to Baltimore, yeah the flight we almost missed, before takeoff we were watching our snap videos.


I was cheesing and swooning to the vibes of memories recently passed and I looked over and Mya was in tears. I was like oh goodness, are you ok. She said in the most pitiful baby voice “yeah, I’m just so sad it’s over.” I didn’t understand the emotion at the time. Until weeks went by, and my lagged withdrawal kicked in. Mine came in the form of anxiety of needing more. Yeah I had a local show to hold me over but it just wasn’t enough. We want more! We want more!

See, Andy told me about this. He said once I go to a festival it would be life changing. His MF ass was so right. It’s like, I have a real problem. One that when taken away, I die slowly inside. PFB is no joke y’all. And just like a junkie I am willing to max out all my MF giphy-4credit to get my ass to the next festival. I want to buy hella wardrobe changes, every hue of unicorn snot and booty glitter on the market. I’m tryna buy out Michaels so I can make my KandyGems to PLUR all over the world!!! I wanna find a Ride or Die Ninja that will party right by my side while Mya and her rollie are hand and hand next to me, until we all get too fucking old and decrepit that if we twerk the wrong fucking way we might break a hip. I’m fucking addicted for life 😐

💋 FeFeline 😽.🍭💎

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